Why Joe Kines?

The Moviegoer made a good point: If Ole Miss selects Ackbar as it's new official mascot*, then all effort should be made to hire Joe Kines as DC. Why? Because it's a trap, that's why:



In Kines' defense, here's the offense OK State was running at the time:



That bitch is fully operational.
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* Yes, I know Ackbar will never be selected. But rarely do I get to enjoy two of my favorite things, college football and Star Wars, at the same time - so just let me enjoy it.

IT'S A TRAP!

Ole Miss is in the hunt for a new mascot and the students have overwhelmingly voted to be included in the decision making process. I have no problem with the retiring of Colonel Reb. Because, as Orson Swindle very suucinctly puts it, it's hard to defend a symbol that offends "the black players who play for your football team, who see your white columned and fictional antebellum paradise as a labor camp filled with death, imprisonment, rape, and the endless annihilation of their families, freedom, dignity, and humanity."

Even better, as a new student committee is formed to develop and propose the new mascot, the image getting the most support is that of the Rebel Alliance's own Admiral Ackbar. And that is fucking sweet! Think about it for a sec, who better symbolizes rebel leadership? Plus, Admiral is a higher naval rank than Colonel is in the army. It's a win-win. Plus, it's funny; like that ugly-ass tree at Stanford. And it's a Star Wars reference. So, really, it's a win-win-win-win.

Will it ever happen? Not a chance. I'd like to say that the powers-that-be cannot repel (fan) firepower of that magnitude, but too many people don't get the reference or understand the cleverness involved in this choice; the sardonic treatment of the over-importance of football at an academic institution, the deflation of the racist image of Ole Miss in the de-seg era, etc. But, like the Rebel Alliance, this group cannot give up, back down, or slack off, even in the face of a greater enemy. Why? Because Han will get that shield down!

BTW, Tony Reali supports the decision, as long as the Cantina theme gets to be the new fight song. I love it.

And, because I'm feeling generous, here's another Ackbar pic:

Knowshon's Knockout Punch!

Apparently, Knowshon Moreno was in town last weekend. Oh, and he also allegedly knocked out some kid downtown. Wow.

Now, there all kind of things suspicious in this story, starting with the fact the kid's 18 and he took two days to file the report, waiting for his friends to "fill in the details." And, by fill in the details, I mean talk the kid into suing an NFL player for a bunch of cash. Some of the commenters have gone as far as comparing Knowshon to Pacman Jones, but I've gotta call bulllshit there; I mean, no innocent bystander got paralyzed or anything. Plus, KM was here for 3 years and never made the police blotter. Now, does that clear him of this incident? Not at all. But what does bode well is that Moreno showed up as soon as questioned, had witness verification of his story of the night, and the other kid's an underage student who couldn't remember anything.

Honestly, it's a party town. People drink. Some times they fight. If I had to bet, I'd say neither side is completely innocent, but also that if KM's not a million dollar NFL RB, we'd have never heard of this story.

From All Over

1. The NCAA finally hears SoCal's case in the whole Reggie Bush matter today. Once the case is heard, there will be a 4-6 week deliberation before announcing the findings. My favorite part is this quote: "the key question NCAA officials will try to answer is: How much did the school know?" Really? How much did the school know? About as much as every SEC school does about all their players...except maybe Vandy. Maybe.

2. Expansion - The Big Ten has been at the center of the expansion rumor whirlwind for months now, but isn't making a decision for 12-18 months. Whatever they choose to do will, despite nay-saying B10 haters, redefine college football. The Texas story was fun while it lasted and Pitt seemed as sure as thing as any, but we're really not anywhere close to a firm decision.

The PAC-10 on the other hand, could have a decision made by the fall. The Buffs are not as much PAC as they are MTN, but it would be a solid addition. Who goes with Colorado, though? The PAC-10 is one of the neatest put-together conferences in any sport: 10 teams total, including 5 natural rivalries in 4 states. Colorado State is the only team you can bring in with the Buffs to continue this trend, so the paradigm will certainly change, as the Rams are not quite the caliber program being sought.

3. Is anyone following the Winter Olympics?

4. How many AQ leagues should we have? If the BCS decides, upon re-evaluating the deal, that the MWC should be included, does that mean the Big East gets the boot? Or, should we just add a 7th conference to the Auto-qualifiers? I'd vote to just add the MWC, or boot the BE and keep both out. But, if the BCS is scared of including the MWC because they'd have to lose the BE, let's do a head to head comparison.

First, the standings:

Mountain West Standings

TEAM	CONF	OVERALL
TCU	8-0	12-1
Brigham Young	7-1	11-2
Utah	6-2	10-3
Air Force	5-3	8-5
Wyoming	4-4	7-6
UNLV	3-5	5-7
San Diego State	2-6	4-8
New Mexico	1-7	1-11
Colorado State	0-8	3-9

Big East Standings

TEAM	CONF	OVERALL
Cincinnati	7-0	12-1
Pittsburgh	5-2	10-3
West Virginia	5-2	9-4
Rutgers	3-4	9-4
Connecticut	3-4	8-5
South Florida	3-4	8-5
Louisville	1-6	4-8
Syracuse	1-6	4-8

The MWC has an extra team, so in fairness, we'll shoot the gap of the bottom three and drop New Mexico. After that, do a simple conference match-up and see what you think. I'm honestly curious who you think would win. Mine looks like this:

1. TCU over Cincy
2. Pitt over BYU
3. Utah over WVU
4. Air Force over Rutgers
5. UCon over Wyoming
6. SoFla over UNLV
7. Louisville over SDSU
8. Colorado St. over Syracuse

That's 4-4. Now, the MWC took 3 of the top 4 match-ups, so if you want to use that and pick them, cool, I get it. But, I'm honestly pretty shaky on that TCU pick...

5. Baseball's right around the corner. I'm admittedly not a huge MLB fan, but I do try to follow Georgia baseball and drop some From the Dugouts updates when I can. So, stay tuned. Or, if we can get Aroo to do it, that'd be great. Because, while this is my geo-socio-political soapbox at times, not his, he sure as fuck knows baseball better than I do.

Happy Valentine's Day!

I saw this on reddit and couldn't leave it alone; it pretty much sums up the entire diamond trade. Fuck you, Debeers, for using the materialistic idiocy of Americans to advance mass human suffering and sell your product. Isn't it all just so romantic?

Prophecy Burn

I just thought this was funny. I've plugged 'em before and I'll do it again, MarriedtotheSea is Hi-Lar-i-ous. Oh, and yeah, Sarah Palin's just awful. Like, cancer awful.

The Super Bowl...kinda...I guess

More people watched last night's Super Bowl than anything that's ever been on TV. Finally, some one knocked that final episode of M*A*S*H of of the perch it's help for 27 fucking years...Alda, that smug bastard. Since college, I've never really embraced the whole "Super Bowl Experience." It's always on Sunday night, I can't stop thinking about having to work the next day, and, because of work, I can't drink as much as I want. That usually means a very low-key, chill evening. I have a two-TV set up in my living room, which allows me to watch 2 games at a time during football season, watch TV and play video games, or watch sports and regular programming. Over the course of the game I did all three, so here's a quick, one-paragraph recap of my Super Bowl experience:

Ooh, it's gonna be a long night, NOLA. The Colts marched to an early FG, stopped anything the Saints could do and with Peyton's TD late in the first, it looked like the rout was on. Then, I actually won back-to-back rounds of free-for-all on Modern Warfare 2 for the first time, like, ever. My kill-death ratio evened out after that and somehow the Siants pulled within 4 points at the half. Then there was the onside kick. AWE-some; great call at a great time. Is there really that much difference in giving Peyton 40 yards or 80 yards? No; take the chance for a momentum swing. After that, I set my reminder to catch the late night showing of Big Love and the Saints took charge through the 3rd and 4th, going up 24-17 after a solid 2-pt play call. American Dad was a rerun, but it was the Rapture episode, which is the best episode of that show ever and then Tracy Porter sealed the game with a pick-six. Nice game! I bet Bourbon Street's still throwing down.

Well, gotta get to work, the future isn't gonna shape itself!

Recruiting Update - 13yo Commits to SoCal

OK Kiffin, this might be a bit too much...13?! I know, I know - the staff has no control over what some kids says. It's still funny, though.

Half-Assed Recruiting Round-Up

Alright, let's look at recruiting (thanks for nothing, Stealler 1). First, what do recruiting rankings tell us? Honestly, not much. A good program will get what they need from an athlete. If you're blessed enough to rake in some 5-stars, then you'll have less distance to cover talent-wise, but they'll still need development. It's like I've talked about on here a million times, coaching is the most important aspect of the college game; what can yo do with the 3-star players? That said, let's explore some things from yesterday.

Apparently a mid-level class in the SEC is still a top-15 haul. No wonder the SEC rules cfb. Georgia lost 3 big recruits in the last 3 weeks, including 2 between Monday night and signing day, failed to get a single 5 star player, and fell to 6th in the SEC, but it was still enough to grade out at a B+, land 8 ESPN top-150, and rank near the top nationwide. What's important here is the defensive talent, especially class leader Alec Ogletree and DL Michael Thornton. TJ Stipling should be a great fit in Grantham's scheme, with enough size to be a OLB/DE hybrid, which is key to the one-gap, aggressive 3-4 we've been promised. Beyond this, I'll let Ben Dukes' post do the work here - not a great class, but not a dud, either.*

Florida landed one of the best classes of all time and 'Bama finished right behind them - no sprprises there, they're the last 2 national champions. But, Auburn came up big, landing a few prize recruits and stunning us with a top-5 finish. i guess the white limos work, huh? Must've been some serious chop blocking talent out there. Another surprise, at least to some, is Derek Dooley's success. Some folks thought he'd lose everybody, especially after the loss of recruit-guru Kippy Brown.

On the national level, it appears Lane Kiffin is still chasing Urban Meyer, as USC finished with what's generally considered a top-10 class. Why are people surprised by this? Did you honestly think kids wouldn't go to southern California now that Carroll's gone? I called for SC to win the PAC-10 next year, and this is only going to help. The NCAA won't be cracking down in LA anytime soon, Kiffin's not the moron people think, and they've got 5 star talent washing the towels they're so deep - that equals wins. Get used to seeing Kiffin and the Trojans near the top every signing day.

Texas and Oklahoma signed the best classes in the Big-XII. Who didn't see that coming? After that, I don't really care anymore. Call me when we hit the field and it matters. Once the 5-star stud breaks his leg and we discover some 2-star kid with 4.0 speed and hands like Billetnikoff.
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* The state of Georgia will be producing some serious talent out of HS in 2011. So, while this year's lack-luster class isn't a big deal, we have to land the big fish next go 'round. That means we must produce on the field this season and win big time match-ups. We have to create a product kids want to buy and that means competing with Florida for the East spot in ATL and landing a big bowl; 7-5 and Shreveport won't cut it next season.

Hey Stealler1, Can We Get Some Updates?!

Stealler1, FTS' recruiting guru, promised to have some recruiting details and insight up today, but we've yet to hear from him.Here's hoping he posts soon, or else I'll have to do it - and that won't be pretty.

Jose Canseco calls out Herschel Walker

Jose Canseco calls out Herschel Walker

Posted using ShareThis

Way Too Early Top-25 for 2010

I wanted to get this in before signing day this week, but it still feels pretty loosey-goosey. But, I guess that's the joy of a February 1st poll.

1. Alabama
The Tide seem set to repeat, but we all thought the same about the Gators in ’09. I will keep ‘Bama in the top spot for now, as I see a lot of attrition in 2010, with no bi time conference champ getting out unscathed. Saban has to replace Cody and McClain, but the new D, while not as good as this year’s, could still be good enough to be the country’s best.

2. Ohio State
I liked the season ending show against Oregon. I hope it proved to Tressel to open it up a bit more, especially when Pryor’s supported by such a strong defense. If the Bucks keep most of their opponents contained, the kid will do enough to get tOSU to 11-1.

3. Virginia Tech
3 things: 1.)The Hokies beat Boise 2.) They also win the ACC 3.) The ACC is overrated. That said, Tech will pull an easy upstart, at-large opponent in the OB to finish with no more than 2 losses.

4. Texas
The ‘Horns are my Big-XII place holder. I think the Sooners could get here, and maybe even the Huskers. I know McCoy’s gone, but Gilbert’s good enough to win the division. After that, with a season under his belt, he should be fine.

5. Wisconsin
Liiiiiiiiimb, I'm on one!

6. Iowa
If Clayborn (whose probably more important to this team than Stanzi) stays, this Hawkeye D will be ferocious. With Americanzi and a fully healthy stable of RB’s, the only question is if the magic will be back in Iowa City.

7. Florida
Meyer’s sabbatical lasted a day-and-a-half and Brantley broke all of Tebow’s FL HS records. Toss in the fact that Georgia has the best chance to knock the Gators out of the East – and we know how that series has gone lately – and look for UF to be back in ATL.

8. Oklahoma
Fear Landry Jones’ mustache.

9. TCU
Sure, whatever. I’ll give the Frogs 12-0 and another BCS loss. They had their chance to earn my love.

10. Boise State
The early loss to VA Tech will knock the Broncos back enough to keep them out of NC talk for another year.

11. USC
Follow my logic: the NCAA lets Troy fight on for another year; the Ducks lose focus in light of their recent rash of criminal distractions; ’09 proves to be a rebuilding year, as all the 5 star talent picks up the slack; nobody else really pushes the conference, leaving the Trojans 2 losses as the best in the league.

12. Miami
I started the season thinking the ‘Canes would be building into a team for the future, but that home stretch made me realize we’re still a year or two away.

13. Oregon
They’ll have a similar record to ’09, but it won’t be enough to over take a resurgent Trojan squad.

14. Nebraska
The D, even without Suh, will be the most dominant squad in the Big-XII. Questions still exist about the offense, however. And, while I think the Huskers can get to the B12CG again, I’d still put them a season or so out of a BCS bowl.

15. Georgia Tech
The Bees lost a lot of talent, but Johnson’s a system coach, so they’ll adapt. Don’t look for them to survive all the close calls this year, leaving them with about 9 wins and CFA Bowl bid.

16. LSU
This rank will be earned on talent alone, as Chavis isn’t enough to keep this team together in the face of Miles’ cracking up. If he doesn’t pull it together, Les Miles could be out of Baton Rouge in a year or two, despite being 3 years removed from a title.

17. Pitt
Will they Big East champions or a mid-range Big Ten team in 2010? The answer decides if the Panthers go up 5 spots or down 3.

18. Georgia
The Dawgs were one loss to UK away from being in this spot at 09’s end. Look for things to improve defensively, despite implementing a new scheme, and the turnovers to even out. GA won’t make it to ATL, or come close, but they won’t be the jangling, rattle-trap, train-wreck they were this year, either.


19. North Carolina
Butch Davis, baby.

20. Arkansas
21. Penn State
22. Oregon State
23. Auburn
24. South Florida
25. Oklahoma State

Is it Pitt?

Rumors are flying that Pitt and the Big Ten have made an expansion agreement, with the Panthers set to be the conference's 12th team. This would very likely be the death of the Big East's AQ status...

And I Thought SEC Fans Had Unreasonable Expectations...

Chris Ault, basically the architect for EVERYTHING NEVADA'S EVER DONE EVER, is on the hot seat! They were a divisions II team - a shitty one at that - when Ault began building them up and now they're a bowl fixture. This is ridicu - wait for it - lous!

On CMR

This is a solid write-up on Richt. Sometimes I think Chris Low is way off base, but this is a rational, reasonable treatment - warts and all - of the dean of SEC coaches. This was much needed on the heels of things like this. I've worried the last two seasons that instead of Richt being the first in a the new wave of top flight SEC coaches, he was the last of the mediocres; merely struggling along until he was fired after a string of losing seasons. But, this year's carousel has given me a dose of "dance with who brung ya" and CMR has a long way to drop before we should think about removing him. Fulmer and Tubs both notched losing seasons towards the ends of their big runs, something Richt has yet to do, terrible defensive staffing aside. Now, can he consistently beat Meyer and Saban? Probably not, but who can?
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UPDATE: Middle ground, with some good questions/points (bravesandbirds).
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Hey, it's just gonna be one of those link-dump, "look at what this other guy wrote" kind of weeks. I'm tooling up my early top-25 for 2010 and prepping for recruiting, so there's not much else to say till the weekend.

How High (Low?) Will Kiffin Be?

Check out Hey Jenny Slater's countdown of the 50 Most Loathsome People in College Football. Numbers 50-41 are up now and I gotta say I like Paul Johnson's inclusion. I just hope there's a special spot reserved near the top (bottom?) for Paul Finebaum.

Oregon - the New Thug U

LaGarrette Blount, pugilist, wordsmith, souljah.

Rob Beard, kicker, Back-haver, concussed.

Jeremiah Masoli, runner, passer, raconteur, thief.

That's just how it is on the cut throat streets of the Pacific northwest; mild rain, temperate climes, craft beer, liberal sensibilities - it's like Compton, man.

Christ, haven't you guys ever heard of driving on an expired license?

A Few More Early Thoughts on 2010

PAC-10 - Things are changing out on the left coast; Southland will no longer be the seat of power, as control is shifting north towards San Fran and Oregon. Stanford is about to pull in a top-20 class and the Ducks are ready to defend their '09 title. Throw in a rebuilding U-Dub and a scrappy Beavs squad in Corvallis, and the LA teams seem so last decade.

SEC - Business as usual.

In the west, 'Bama will hold court as long as Saban is around. With a national title, b-2-b undefeated regular seasons, and b-2-b top-5 recruiting hauls (with another on the way), there's no one in the division to take down the Tide. However, it is the SEC and stumbling blocks abound. Look for Arkansas and Auburn to hang around more than they should in a lot of games and one of them to actually beat Alabama.

In the East, Florida will hang on to its top spot. Meyer's sabatical lasted a day and a half and he's already said he's caoching spring ball. Mix that in with the nation's top class 2 years running and Brantley stepping in for Tebow and I don't see who's beating the Gators out of a trip to ATL. The Kiffin debacle has set UT back and the OBC has not lived up to expectations, leaving Georgia as the best team to topple the UF strangle hold...and we've all seen the record in that series from the last 20 years.

Coaches - Now that the carousel has settled down, let's look around and see who did well - and who got capital-F Fucked - in all the moving. First, the obvious, Tennessee. I think Dooley will eventually be competitive in the league and it could start on signing day if he saves that top-15 class. After that, he knows how to coach and he gets the traditions in Knoxville, as well as the league, and could be a solid coach at a program like Tennessee.* I think the Vols will be better off without Kiffin. He just didn't get it here and fits MUCH better back in SoCal. But, he'll have a heck of a time sorting through the fog of NCAA violations hanging over that program.

It's about time Tubs got back in the game, and if he drops the good ol' boy antics that doomed Auburn, Texas Tech should be OK, even if he did shit-can McNiel. But, Ruffin landed on his feet at ECU, which is a good fit, too. Skip Holtz is a good young coach coming up and should do SoFla proud, as Kelly's flight from Cincy has left the Big Least wide open. Speaking of, Kelly will do better at Notre Dame than Weis did, but he's also the litmus test to see if the program is past its prime.**

I'd also bet we'll see coaches playing a little closer to the rules this season after Mangino, Leach, and Leavitt all lost jobs to inappropriate treatment of players. And I'm glad, too. Saban's an asshole, a hard coach, and he never lets up on his players, but he doesn't hit them or lock them in sheds to prove points like a child. That's the difference between being an 8-win coach and a 12-win coach: management.

I know there's a ton of other coaching changes to address, but that's all I've got right now.

Keep an eye out for the Way-Too-Early Top-25 for 2010 later this week.
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* Plus, it's nice for UGA to know that if Dooley does really well, we can always lure him home in the wake of a Richt departure. Speaking of, how likely is CMR to stay here for 10 more years?

** Honestly, I hope not. I know I've railed against ND here before, but that was more because of the Weis hype/Willingham situation than the program itself. I actually hope the Domers come back, they're good for cfb. But. so is the Big Ten and things are looking bleak there, too.

Early Ideas for 2010

Alabama - The Tide will be a preseason favorite to not only win the SEC, but to repeat as national chamions. They keep Ingram and McElroy will continue to do just enough and keep the mistakes to a minumum. Cody and McClain are HUGE losses, but Saban defenses always reload - not rebuild. True, the '10 version of the D might be a touch softer, but it still might be enough to be the best in the land. My early predictions, though, call for at least 1 loss.

The Big-XII - Will Texas be the favorite to repeat in the Big-XII? I'm not sure, honestly. They lose Shipley and McCoy, but it's not like the rest of the league's that loaded. Much like past seasons - but unlike this year - the South will come down to UT and OU. The big Question is whether or not Nebraska will be serious in their role as North Champ. Suh's gone, but the D should recover enough to be dominant; it's the offense that will decide the Huskers fate. If it catches up, look for a North team to be the best in the Big-XII...and it's been a long time since we said that.

Boise State - I'm sorry, I know you had two good wins, but there's no way we can give a WAC team the nod over an undefeated SEC team who knocked off an unbeaten Big-XII team. Alabama is clearly the national champion and they will still be the favorite next season, despite the fact that Boise returns just as many key elements. See, the WAC isn't a proving ground and the Broncos non-conference slots just aren't enough to create a schedule good enough* to compete with teams who play in the bigs. You played -and beat - Oregon and TCU? Great. Who else did you play? Oh, LA Tech and Idaho. Sorry, we were looking for LSU and Florida. We would have also accepted Nebraska and Oklahoma. Hell, in a pinch, maybe even Miami and VA Tech. That's why, barring a bloody regular season that leaves all big-time champions with 2 losses**, Boise State, even undefeated, won't play for the title in 2010. Or - especially if they don't change leagues - ever.
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* I Know nobody will agree to play Boise State, but even if they played 4 of the best BCS teams in the nation in their non-conf. slots, they'd still be weighted down with WAC opponents in the other 8 games. It just doesn't cut it. Is it fair? No, especially when you factor in that the Big East is AQ and the MWC is almost in, too. But, I don't make the rules.

**And, if the conference champions all have 2 losses, it would be indicative of even more competition, not less talent at the top. Think of 2007. Should Hawaii have playe

What a lucky guy!

I know this is random, but I figured this is one topic that everyone on this blog could agree (or agree to disagree on). I was watching some Adam Sandler movies recently and decided that we needed a top 10 Adam Sandler leading ladies poll. Here's mine, feel free to add or comment. (BTW, they are in order of how hot they were in THAT movie, not how great of an actress they are, nor how good of a movie it was.)

10 Fairuza Balk- The Waterboy
9 Leslie Mann- Funny People
8 Joey Lauren Adams- Big Daddy
7 Drew Barrymore- Wedding Singer & 50 First Dates
6 Winona Ryder- Mr. Deeds
5 Julie Brown- Happy Gilmore
4 Marissa Tomei- Anger Management
3 Bridgette Wilson- Billy Madison
2 Kate Beckinsale- Click
1.5 Jessica Biel- Chuck & Larry
1 Emmanuelle Chriqui- You dont mess with the Zohan

NOTE: I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT JESSICA BIEL! WHEN I WAS LOOKING AT THE SANDLER FILM LIST AND I SAW CHUCK & LARRY, I THOUGHT FAGS AND DIDNT WANT TO PUT KEVIN JAMES ON THE LIST. I COULDNT QUITE PUT HER #1, BUT SHE MAY HAVE HAD THE FILTHIEST SCENE OF ANY OF THE MOVIES.