Alabama's Proxy War

Addicted to Quack had a guest poster this week, Kleph, from Roll Bama Roll, and he put together a quick-and-dirty primer on how to hate Auburn in preparation for the BCS Title Game. While the post is somewhat funny, it's the comments that actually provide the most comedy - these two fan-bases really hate each other and hijacked an Oregon thread to make that abundantly clear. I'd say the cyber-Ducks who started this didn't know what they were getting into, but they're no strangers to rivalry based hatred and violence. Having this heated SEC hatred flare up on the west coast has helped put all this in perspective for me, though; The Auburn and Alabama fan bases are NOT DIFFERENT. Use the points Kelph brought up and tell me you can't apply them to both programs, especially cheating (duh), racism (it's Alabama for fuck's sake), and "pants losing" (Hello, Mike Price). I mean, swap the schools in the comments and it makes as much sense. Here's one pulled at random:

Glad y’all have nothing better to do than get on Oregon blogs and whine and complain. You just CAN’T HANDLE Auburn having success. I’m loving it. Look for me on TV in Arizona. WAR EAGLE!

Now, change it up:

Glad y’all have nothing better to do than get on Oregon blogs and whine and complain. You just CAN’T HANDLE Alabama having success. I’m loving it. Look for me on TV in Arizona. ROLL TIDE!

You could have just as easily seen this on a Texas thread last year. And you could argue that this post could appear on any site, being exchanged between fans of any rival schools. But, I had to pick this one because it's the only one that was short enough to post here and not carrying ninety-seven attached replies. Seriously, just take a stroll through the comments, it's good reading...unless you're a fan, then you might be there for a while, fighting the good fight. Man, there's nothing like the straw men and ad hominem fallacies attached to college football "debate"! And nowhere is this better exemplified than in the most heated of rivalries.

(h/t GTP)